Friday, November 30, 2007
It's Raining and today was an eye opening day. #146
As I sat here reading comments on my last post, I felt a need to answer something Rella asked. In reading your post I wondered how did it feel for you to be among so many cynics in one room :)...at the end did you feel it was a powerful talk? Will it help your leadership skills? And the answer is...yes to both. I reminded me that in some sense I had started to become like all of them. I was reminded of the person I used to be and I have vowed to find her again. Not that I have become a mean ogre because if you ask most of my employees, they will say that I am fair, that I will go to bat for them, even if it means I catch heat for it. But I am talking about the leader Cindy. The person who was "enthusiastic". The person who would gather people for events, like Halloween and Christmas and get everyone to dress up and join together. Such as the picture that follows. Megan is the Cindy Lou Who, so this was awhile ago.But over the years, because of "politics" at work, I decided to take more of a "back seat" role and I have tried not to "shine" too much and face the jealousy and sarcasm that was coming my way. By the time I left my job in 2005 to move to Kentucky, I was beaten down, worn out and just plain old disgruntled. But when we moved back here, I still wanted to work for this company. It just happens that I was blessed enough to be moved over to the sister company. But I have still "laid low" per say to not make waves. But in doing so, I have lost a big piece of me. I have lost the "fun" Cindy. The "competitive" Cindy, the "leader" Cindy. So, today is where it starts. Today is where I take the higher road and ignore the naysayers and negative Nelly's and just be me. Today is the day when I start to answer the question "Who does she think she is?" with, I am Cindy. Because, in the end, I will come out on top. In the end, I want to know that I have made a difference.