I am....

I know that I have not blogged in MONTHS!!! I have been having my own pity party for far to long and now it's time to kick myself in the but, pull myself up by the bootstraps and get busy living the life I want and not crying about what I don't have... The only person I can blame is myself for not taking any steps to get there... So I have been reading books and more books, and more books...LOL TRYING to find my way out of my fog...I needed something to inspire me. Jen told me I needed to get the book "I could do anything if I only knew what it was." It has been a pretty good book for me to read. It really makes you take a look at what brings you happiness and what you really would love to do in life and use your strengths to do it well. So it asks you to go back in time and think about what you did as a kid that brought you happiness.... And so I did...When I was little, I was always crafting something...me and my little sister would create snakes out of clay to play with in the backyard. My mom would always buy me paint by number kits, or those marker posters. Nothing was safe from being changed. Our little people houses would get carpeting put in them and furniture hand crafted by us. What imaginations we had... I think the most telling moment was when I was 12. We were moving once again and my dad told us we only got one box a piece to put the toys we wanted into and take with us...everything else had to go. My dad had just given me a couple months before, a whole box full of old art supplies that he had used in his work. I told him that that was the box I wanted to take, that I didn't care about anything else, which was a big thing for me as I had a ton of Breyers horses and Misty Books, etc...as I was a horse fanatic too. I was willing to give up all my horses to take art supplies.... Well...he didn't let me take the art supplies... So now, later in life...I am a collector...of art supplies.... I love to buy them, display them. I try to use them...LOL I have a horrible habit of trying to buy every color...even if I won't use them all...

I love to see all the items lined up in rows, color after color and knowing that if I want a color that it is there for the using.... My latest purchase was these little bottles of German glass glitter...(purchased here)

Who knows if I will use all these colors, but they look so good with all my other supplies...LOL Ok...so what is the point of all this??? I know what I want to do...I have wanted to do it for years but I have never done a single thing to move forward. I want to have my own business....It will be some kind of art business, where I can buy supplies and place them on the shelves and make them look nice, where people can come and create, hang out and have fun and make arty friends...This is my dream....and the only way I am gonna get there is one step at a time....I don't know when I will get there but here is to taking chances and longs walks.....LOL