Self Honesty

Last night during a conversation I was told that even 20 years ago, I have always been strong, independent and a risk taker. Every time I am told that I tend to shrug it off as if they didn't know what was really inside me, they didn't know the "real" me. But maybe they knew me better than I did. The other day, my ex had to go help his girlfriends daughter out of the snow. He ended up taking the truck, so Megan was with out a vehicle for a day. I was irritated. In being honest with myself, I was annoyed because he had to go play the "hero". Had to rescue the damsel in distress. And I guess in the end, that is why our marriage ended. Because I didn't "need" him. And that is what he "needs". And that brought me to my realization...my self honesty...and trust me...it's not an easy pill to swallow. Way back when....I "dumbed myself down" to get a man. There, I said it. I played the helpless female that I so despise these days. And in reflecting, I see how many problems it caused in our marriage. We always fought about my ambition, my drive to be better, to do more. But now...I don't have to do that anymore. I am free to be me. Who I really am. And if men or anyone else is afraid of that...then I don't need them. And if someone asks "Who does she think she is?" I will tell them...I am Cindy Dean! I am strong, proud, independent and a free spirit....take me as I am....